My personal challenge

First off, Happy 4th of July! I hope everyone enjoys their family time and be safe while traveling and doing any outside activities.





I watched the weather report this morning and it seems like parts of Texas will have plenty of scattered rain showers all weekend long. Just what we need. Humid warm air as people spend time outside grilling, watching parades and enjoying 4th of July holiday activities. Our annual parade in Belton, a must see for plenty of Central Texas residents, is scheduled for 10:00 a.m. And when I awoke this morning at six a.m., it was raining. But now, at parade time, the skies are overcast and the air is sticky. I didn't make it to the parade even though our Safe Kids Van is being driven by one of my co-workers. She is our Injury Prevention coordinator for our hospital. I could have gone to support her, but I opted this morning to tend to me.

Recently, I joined a gym. Actually, it was about three weeks ago. And ten days ago, i began logging my activities/food diet on

www.myfitnesspal.com

I utilize this to keep my progress tallied. My starting weight is at 207. My blood sugars have been up over 200's for quite a long time. I've been living in denial too. It helps to have monthly visits with the pharmacology folks to monitor my diabetes. And finally, I have a guy I see to discuss things vs these skinny, young woman who are too lovely and may never have worries about a chronic disease. It might be their job to help me, but it's hard to take their advice. I can't sympathise and feel they judge me.

So after shuffling my appts, I landed seeing a guy. For the life of me, I can't think of his name, and yes, he's thin too, but his mannerism towards me is like, "lets see what we can alter or do to get these numbers down. Fill me on your foods you normally eat." And then he challenges me, "Try limiting red meat, breads, pasta as your triglycerides are up. Let's park further down on parking lots", "try walking 40 minutes per week".

It's like he's coaching me or being on my side. I like him. So, ok..the last challenge got me to thinking, I can do that. How easy! 40 minutes a week is nothing. I can do that at least 3 or 4 times a week. And for one month, I made an attempt to do it. I got it done only 3 days out of a whole month. Horrible. I was disappointed that I had failed this.. and failed him too. And then on my last visit with him, he explained to think about my high blood sugars like rocks in my system. The bang, bang, bang upon my vital organs, causing them to break down, tear down, and not work for me. All those little capillaries and nerve endings too. What a mental picture that made for me. I decided I would do something about it as I walked out the door at the end of the appointment.

I began to evaluate everything. My home life. My stress. My lack of commitment. And then I have one of my co-workers, who has budding diabetes, (which means she is suppose to manage with diet and exercise and takes minimal pills for it) who is in denial of her blooming weight gain. "As long as I'm healthy," she says, while grabbing a whole pint of ice cream from downstairs and eating it about an hour or two after we've eaten. And she had a lot of carbs for lunch. Through her, I can see myself and my own stupid denial. Her advantage is that she is about thirteen years younger than me, so there is time to make adjustments if she gets serious about it.

So, I decided to get serious. I would make myself a thirty day challenge. By the time I go back to see my pharmacology dude, I would strive to:

* Hit the gym three to four times a week.
* Increase my stamina on the treadmill.
* Watch my diet and use fitnesspal to keep tally on my carbs/fats/protein and most importantly, my calories.

I set my goal at around 1200 calories a day and 40 minutes of exercise per day, but I don't always make that. Sure I flub here and there as I make adjustments to my other commitments and to my meal plans. But I try not to skip but one day in between of getting exercise. If I eat one bad meal, then the next will be even better and on target.

Really, when you start seeing the amount of carbs/calories/fat grams one actually consumes, it is a real eye opener. I'm doing better lately. I do think I've lost five pounds so far and my blood sugars are finally hitting the normal ranges. I have lab and my regular doctor appointment on Wednesday and perhaps my recent workouts will make my lab values better, but I'm just starting out again. If they are not up to snuff, then long range, I have three more months before I go back to see my primary doc. In between, on monthly visits, I have my guy. I am in the mindset to make myself healthy again, the right way.

And just this morning, when I skipped going to the parade to concentrate on myself, I actually worked out for sixty minutes. And I did 3 miles on the treadmill. Whoo Hoo!!!

When I complete the initial thirty days, I will set more mini-goals. My long range goal is to be around 180 by the time my birthday falls in September. Wish me luck.

We are off into the New year of 2010

Well, we are off into the new year. It's hard to believe I am alive in 2010. It sounds like some star date Captain Kirk may have mentioned on the series Star Trek. I've been around since 1959 and I'm now 50 years old. A lot of stuff has occurred in my lifetime, like the assassination of President Kennedy; Mans first walk on the moon; the inventions of the cable, Internet, and cell phones and most importantly, small computers/laptops to fit into one's homes. Wow, technology at its best and some to make our lives a bit easier in the kitchen, such as the microwave. I'm so grateful to those who dreamed up these products in the first place. Sometimes when I go camping, roughing it up without these miracle conveniences, then I do take time to appreciate them. I can't imagine what it must have been like over a century ago, when someone like me, may have reflected on her life in 1910. So many changes; so much progress.

I guess as I look down the road into the next fifty years, I can only pray that I can live to see what comes next. All the good things, of course. Of course it's scary because we are going into the unknown. With the factors of Aids; homelessness; economic crisis; global warming and even terrorism, we know we must face adversity. We must learn to overcome. Our children will be very affected by things we sometimes just take for granted that comes in the news. Hopefully, they will grow and cause changes in socialism and government to be positive; to lessen the threats of these evils. With hope, there is a chance for a better future.

With this said, I can move forward into 2010. I want positive changes just in myself and within my own household. To start, my list of resolutions are small, but positive:

1) Lose weight to improve my stamina, health and control my diabetes.

2) Eat healthier selections and eliminate the junk and fast foods.

3) Organize my junk drawers, closets, and throw away or donate what's not been pulled out in over a year. Why keep if you don't wear it or use? Some one's trash maybe the treasure someone else seeks.

4) Be more time efficient in everything, so that I don't fall off schedule or run behind.

5) Take time to meditate or write often. I so need to take a quiet "me" time once in awhile as my life does get a bit crazy with work, family, and aging parents. Even taking care of the pets can be stressful. So I need to dedicate one hour per day just to zone out. And while I'm doing this, perhaps jot down ideas or goals during this reflective time.

6) Take time to be thankful for my blessings. I need to pray more often and visit my mom more. She turns 81 this year and I know the time is slipping away. I want to communicate more and show appreciation to my close friends. Without their support, I don't know how I'd pull through sometimes.

7) Vacations/getaways- My husband is my ally most days and I want to schedule more weekend getaways and plan a vacation spot to visit late this year or early next summer. He wants to go back to Ohio to show me around. I'd also like to make one trip back to Florida to re-visit old in laws and their families, and one to Denver to visit my eldest daughter with her new baby this spring

8) Most of all, I want to finish up my Cross Passage book series. I have two manuscripts to edit and I procrastinated finishing up the 3rd installment. So my goal is to have "Hearts Restless Winds" out by early spring. And then the final installment , still untitled, by winter.

9) I want to work on promoting my Cafemom group, The Written Voice, newest book. Our Written Voices, is being sold now on Amazon to benefit the David's House facility in New Hampshire. I'm so proud of our contribution of poems and short stories for such a worthy cause. I'd think it would be fun to get our members to contribute submissions again by early fall, but we'll see how we are doing by then before we commence.

(To join, click here: The Written Voice.

10) I want to help my senior daughter to realize her dream of visiting Germany in August, as sort of a belated high school graduation gift. I still have to buy her passport and airline fare. After that, it's just the target of saving for her spending money. She's just begun working a good job at the hospital, so she might be able to put away some spending cash before then.

So there's my top ten list of resolutions. I guess resolutions can be goals too. I"m sure I'd probably have missed some ideas to post but if I can reach any five of these, it would be considered milestones.

Just this past weekend, I have cleaned up my house and stored away all of the Christmas decorations. I've pretty much eaten up all of the leftover ham, candy, cookies and am ready to start anew on my diet come Monday morning. The new year is off to a good start and no matter what comes, I am ready to handle all of the challenges. With God's love and the support of great family and friends, I will enter the unknown with a smile and much courage